Freelance Problems

#Freelanceproblems

Anyone who works freelance will be well acquainted with some of these common pitfalls. Have we missed something? Click here to join the discussion.

Power sockets

Look at those dickheads lording it over because they knew to sit at that chair with the plug sockets. You meanwhile have become with the simple bleep of a laptop an electricity beggar, cautiously searching for some precious nourishment. Some guy has even got a cable snaking into some hidden crevice only the cleaners know about. If the power goes you can’t work. You bought a coffee twenty minutes ago so you can’t move on somewhere else yet. You also take your empty cup with you as your ‘license to freelance here’. Perhaps you could just squat in the corner for twenty minutes to fill up a little bit? But then you see people just like you sat at a table, headphones in and with a spare chair. You learn…

The Freelancer’s Wave

They have headphones in. The chair opposite them is empty and they are quite blatantly alone. They also have plugsockets free! This is probably the closest you will get to using semaphore in a real life situation. Raise eyebrows, open eyes questionably and raise your hand roughly between the chair and the person as if supplicating Jesus. Mumble something, it doesn’t really matter what as long as your lipsmove. In response they will nod slightly and open their arms in the ‘don’t worry about it bro, feel free’ signal. You decide not to feign a comrade fist-bump.

Locations

You can work in some pretty good locations. Most museums and galleries have free wifi and toilets- which is basically all you need? Maybe the crucial point is to rotate. As we all know, while we are working we aren’t really experiencing all London has to offer. The freelancer can improve on this by working in one coffee shop in the morning before heading out somewhere else.

The Bed-office

Plenty of us will try working in bed. You don’t even have to wear clothes. The problem is the rituals of living are disrupted. In a small home your sleep, leisure, dining and work can easily clash- meaning you end up working before bed and watching Netflix at the table. Your hours seem to tie themselves to their place, so sometimes it’s better to kick work out into a nearby space.

The Pub

Ok Hemingway. Working in the pub can seem a brilliant plan. Especially if you’re in a creative role and need to lubricate the imagination- or whatever you tell your colleagues. But this can harm you too as a leisure space of escape becomes a workplace. Incidentally, Wetherspoons offer free refills of filter coffee until 2pm…

Your Username

It’s not really a problem- but do you really use your details to sign up for free Wifi? Or do you have an email-nom-de-plume? Maybe you just fill in the minimum criteria a@b.com…

 

 

 

The Guilt

Could Einstein tell us what the exchange rate is of latte for time and space? If a place is small and busy you don’t really want longer than ten minutes after finishing your coffee, unless you intend to buy food. In a cavernous chain at low time you quite happily have a small Americano and let the hours roll by. See ‘Freelance Dick’ in ‘Coffee- London’s Lifeblood Addiction’.

Other Commitments

You may be lounging about in Costa- but you are working. People you know won’t understand this. Every hour you work is important; just your hour off for lunch adds up over a week. No, you can’t take the afternoon off to go shopping with someone. But you’re not going to be so hard to a significant other, refusing romance for a cultural standard of professionalism and a bit of money. You don’t make up for it that evening, so you either have to compensate at the weekend or you’ve lost out. And all you did was browse John Lewis and go to Mcdonalds…

Getting up

So the freelancer rises around 1pm right? You have the benefit of spending your whole commute in bed. You don’t even need to look presentable, that’s why trousers are doomed. Actually, unlike your student days you know well those extra hours are costing you. It’s not great when you see it’s five o’clock only to realise you’ve only been working four hours. Everyone else clocking off has been going since nine! If you want that relaxed evening – whether it’s Netflix, dinner or the cinema – you need to fall out and get going in the morning. This again is a case of separating work and rest, since working late to catch up gets into your switching off time. The benefit is felt around 11.30am when you see how much you have accomplished when you would normally just be starting. Lunch break, a couple more hours, then pub.

 

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Stewart Vickers Instagram/Twitter @vickhellfire

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