London is one of the world’s most liberal places when it comes to gender and sexuality. However, we have continued to change both our attitudes and terminology, expanding LGBT to now LGBTQ+. The ‘plus’ somewhat invalidates the category in a positive way that reflects our growing acceptance of individuality. Now there is a growing case that all may be a spectrum- not gay or straight nor male nor female. And within this sphere of identities, we change and morph over time.
It is easy to dismiss such contemplation as mere social theory that doesn’t affect the bulk of us in our straight, gendered palaces. However, we all have a place within this spectrum. The sooner we realise this, the easier things become for those lost at opposed ends of the scale. Many criticise dysmorphia as a curable condition or mere passing fancy. But to those affected the confinement can be unbearable, while the rest of us complain about going up a jean size.
Uniform Policies and Office Standards of Gender
Perhaps where most of us see gender becoming problematic is in dress codes. Donald Trump has said his female employees should ‘dress like women.’
This debate ranges from long hair to make up and jewellery. Who is allowed to wear it? Who is not allowed to wear it? Women can still be expected to wear skirts and heels but must still look ‘professional’. School uniform can be dreadfully imposing in formative years. In dress in general, we have set social codes of what is ‘acceptable.’ Even today, men are not to wear nail varnish- although Ozzy Osbourne is among a throng of celebrities who have long ignored this. Men were wearing eyeliner in the sixties and yet today it remains controversial. Fundamentally, it is about caring. Women should care how they look and men shouldn’t. One must spend time and effort on it, the other shouldn’t.
While women can tone down for a more tom-boy personality and men can shake off flamboyance as ‘rockstar’, actually settling between the genders is far more complicated.
Gender-neutral Facilities
This has been far more of an issue than it really should be. Men are used to the sheer terror of thinking they have the wrong one, only to sigh relief at the sight of urinals. However, this Victorian custom is as trivial as standups and sitdowns. The vast majority of us really couldn’t care less about who is what side of the wall. More and more venues are waking up to this fact and leaving toilets open for all. Fitting rooms in shops are basically the same, right?
Changing rooms become more complicated. Of course, for each person who couldn’t care less there is someone who would feel very much a victim. People debate when a child should have to use the changing room specified for their gender. So where is a person of non-binary or opposite gender to their sex supposed to go? Do we really need to make every facility a mass of individual cubicles?
Ultimately the solution lies is in when we as a society can accept both our own and other people’s bodies. We can’t cope with the sight of boob or nob as much as we can cope with fat people, or tattoos, or varicose veins. If only we could live life like a Renaissance fresco.
Genderless Clubs
While women have only recently been accepted into the workplace, leisure space remains highly gendered.
The gender policies on nights out are medieval, even in liberal London. ‘High end’ clubs will control entry to maintain a perfect image. A small group of men requires a throng of ladies clad to precise specification. Even outside these, there are plenty of unwritten codes. Women may exploit this to gain free drinks as well as self-confidence whilst simultaneously exposing themselves to predatory men. On the other side, men are also pressured about their looks. Displays of wealth and physical fitness seem to dominate. Dressing remotely individually is frowned upon. The result is confinement of both genders.
What of old institutions like the Freemasons who will not admit women? Numerous politicians have resigned from White’s Club because they refused to admit women. Equally, plenty of feminist organisations refuse to encourage men. Only when we are blind to gender will we see true equality.
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